The CN Climb

As I got closer to the CN tower yesterday morning I met more and more people in red T-shirts. They had all gone up the CN tower for the United Way campaign using the stairs. Their sweaty T-shirts and exhausted faces really worried me, because I was on my way to do the same thing.

Frankly speaking, my bottom is a bit sore today. I am not totally out of shape, but I have never climbed that many steps at once as I did yesterday. After 23 minutes and 55 seconds sweating in the staircases of CN tower I finally reached the top. The average time is about 30 minutes, so I felt quite good about my accomplishment. After enjoying the view for a while the elevator took me down in two minutes. When I got outside the tower my eyes followed the grey pedestal all the way up to the white bulb where I just came from, and I could not believe that I walked all the way up there!

I would like to thank all of you who contributed to this event by donating money! My donations summed up to $80, and I definitely think it was worth climbing for : )

Monday

Thursdays and Fridays I have the honour of having company in my office room, by part time student Karen. It is really pleasant to have a reason to take a brake for a chat and it is so easy since she is right next to me. Off course she is a very nice woman. But today it is Monday and I am alone in the room...

Last week I spent a lot of time riding the rocket between FSA Offices. I appreciate the opportunities I get to spend time outside my office room, but last week was a bit much. Therefore I did not really get the chance to enjoy the company in the office last week and now Thursday seems far away. Most of the staff in this office work part time, which makes Mondays quiet compared to the busy end of the week when they are all in.

On Wednesday the other student, Daisy, will come in and stay until Friday. She is next door, but I can relay on her sunny visits now and then. Mondays are tough for everyone, they say, but the contrast of the enjoyable Friday makes the Monday even more boring. As I hope for the two first days of the week to pass quickly, I am going to fall deep into my reading…

Ups and downs

This morning I woke up feeling like a reflection of the weather outside. The sun was well hid behind dark rain clouds, which turned the whole world grey and wet. I did not feel this way when I went to bed and I do not know what happened during the night, but I guess we all have those days… Anyway, no matter why I suffered from this state of mind, it made me think about working as a counsellor.

Two weeks ago I started as a co-counsellor with one of the social workers in the counselling program. We have a session once a week and I have an active role although the primary counsellor takes the lead. The idea is that I will practice my counselling skills; apply theory in my approach, learn how to do accurate assessments and improve my abilities to communicate as a professional. So far everything has been going well, but I am glad I do not have a meeting today because I would not be able to do a good work. So how do the social workers cope? How can I be supportive and focus on the situation of a client if my mind is occupied coping with my own emotions? There is no way a counsellor can be on top every day, life is not that smooth. The private life of any person has its ups and downs. I suppose this is part of being a professional, to put other problems aside and focus on the client. It has definitely come to my awareness that this is one more thing I would like to learn before I graduate as a social worker.

Research project

Among other things I'm doing a little research project on behalf of the Seniors and Caregivers Support Service Unit. As you can tell by the name, this unit gives support to elder and their caregivers when age brings difficulties into life. Some cases also involve abuse. From experience in abuse cases, the staff tells me that it's very difficult to convince an elder woman who have been abused to move out of her home if she lives together with the abuser. The reason are many, but for one thing the women has no where to go. As in many cases the woman needs a place to land on her way to independent living and for most women it’s a shelter. For an elder woman a shelter is not a very appealing option. They tend to be noisy, stressful and occupied with younger women and children. Therefore some shelters around Canada are especially designed to match the needs of elder women. My research project is about taking a look at those shelters known to admitting elder women and find out how they work by interviewing some of the staff. It’s interesting for me since I use to volunteer in a shelter in Sweden, before I entered the University. My experience at that shelter opened my eyes for social work and was the main reason I started my studies. I have never come across this kind of specialized shelter in Sweden so it will be an opportunity for me to learn about something different.

To serve and protect

As I work close to the staff members at FSA, they share their experiences and I try to learn from it. One situation that has come up a few times recently, really made me upset. It’s about how police officers approach elder victims and perpetrators of abuse, when they arrive in a home after an emergency call.

Imagine an elder woman living together with her husband since they got married fifty years ago. Ever since the early years of their relationship he has been abusive to her. Over the years he got his wife isolated and managed to control every corner of her life. The abuse was verbal at first, but now their history together talks about violence in a physical, sexual and material way. The woman has always found more reasons to stay in the relationship than leave, and many of these reasons are influenced by threats from the husband. When she has looked for help though, the society and people in her surroundings have turned her down, not taking her seriously or being afraid to get involved for the sake of their own safety.

The police get an emergency call from this woman one night and she says she fears for her life because her husband has threatened to kill her. After a while (far too long time) two police officers arrive at the house where the married couple live. They find an eighty year old man and his wife the same age. The officers don’t have to think twice about deciding what to do in this situation. They calm the situation down and then leave without charging the man or securing the safety of the woman in any way. Compared to them, the man looks frail and they could never imagine he could be of any harm to this world. They don’t want to put a grandpa in jail! Whatever he’s done in his life it’s too late to make up for it at his age. If the woman has stayed with him all these years, and put up with the abuse, what difference would it make to change the situation now?

Is this how police officers think when they meet victims of abuse who are elder? Sometimes it seems like it. The impression I get from this scenario is that women loose their value when they get older. If she hasn’t left the abuser through all these years, it’s too late to ask for help now. It should be the other way around, I think; a woman should be more entitled to receive help from society the more crimes she has been a victim to. It’s a matter of human rights to live free from violence and it's a obligation for the police to serve and protect the citizens.

It gives me hope though, that FSA spread awareness about these issues and that the professional staff members are availible for women in similar situations. Also, I know that FSA work together with the police to try to solve these problems.

My office view

The view from my office room without windows would not do very well in a poem. Grey nuances of cold, covers everything from the floor and up. There is a good thing about these surroundings though; I'm encouraged to step out and seek for the warmth and colourful on the other side if of my door. And I find it. On the short path to the tiny kitchen many open doors invite me for a chat. As I look into each little room I see the personality of each staff member, at least what they share with the use of decorations, and everywhere it reflects caring and smiles. The friendly climate among the staff members here cannot hide and from the first day they made me feel welcome.